05 May Cut Through The Crap, Find Your Voice
Originally Posted Sept 16, 2014
We’re halfway through September, the month of back-to-school, fresh starts and apples. My newsletter is late. I did sit down at the beginning of the month to write and truth be told – nothing came out.
I thought maybe I just had too much on my plate so I cleared 2 days last week to do only one thing – WRITE. I had three things to accomplish;
- Write Sept. Newsletter.
- Write my “Make Space For What Matters” phone call.
- Write /prep for an upcoming telesummit I’m thrilled to be a part of.
After 2.5 hours nothing was on paper (well, computer screen).
I panicked. Did I lose my mojo? Have I got nothing to say?
I started with my elevator speech hoping that would spark something.
“I help busy momprenuers clear the clutter and chaos from their homes, schedules and minds so that their businesses run smoothly and they can be the patient moms they long to be.”
I stared at that for far too long and felt only one thing – nauseous. I mean, YUCK! Who the hell wrote that because it definitely didn’t sound like me.
Here’s the thing – I realized, with a little help from a friend, that I had lost my voice and my inner self just could not take the BS any longer. I didn’t have laryngitis, I’m taking about my true, authentic voice.
We all have one but maybe we only allow those closest to us to hear it. My husband, Monkey Boy, a few close family & friends have heard mine. It’s direct, no sugar coating but optimistic with a hint of sarcasm & general silliness. Why was I struggling to let all of you hear it?
Look, as women we all put on many outfits to fit our different roles. I’m going to use Sara Ballard’s paper doll analogy. Our true selves are the naked paper doll. Not many people get to see that, but it’s us stripped down, open, authentic. We then put on the 50’s dress and apron to be the doting wife & mother. Slap on some Capri’s and sneakers and we’re transformed to the ultimate soccer mom. We’ve got our work outfit, PTA and so on.
Sometimes in the mist of all of those costume changes we lose something. I lost a bit of myself and it all began when I became a mom.
There are some truly beautiful, life altering things that happen when you become a parent. I experienced those things. I also felt completely inadequate most of the time.
I struggled to recover from giving birth, to breast feed, to fit in with the new mommy group. I felt like everything I was doing on a daily basis was going to screw my son up in some way. Was I holding him enough or too much? Pacifiers will screw up his teeth. BPA will mess with his mind. My brain was spinning with so much info, fear and self doubt that I was a total spaz.
I over compensated by taking on WAY too many things to try to fit in and be liked. I couldn’t say no to people. Host this playdate -sure. Organize this community event- OK. Solve clients’ problems at 10pm – why not? Give, Give. Give.
All that giving took lots away from me and my boys. What was left at the end of the day was a tired, humorless, grumpy mom.
It wasn’t until I was diagnosed with adrenal fatigue and a thyroid condition that I FINALLY woke up. I started saying NO to people, set boundaries for work. While I progressed so much, it’s obvious from my writer’s block that I still have a ways to go.
Could I continue sharing tips with you on how to get organized like I’ve done in the past?
Sure, but truthfully, I don’t want to.
I’m embarking on a new path in my business. I’m diving deeper to help women cut through the clutter, chaos and crap to get to the life that they want. The important stuff that they dream about for themselves and their family. How can I be there for them if I’m not giving 100% of my true self – scars and all?
I’m facing my fears. Putting myself out there means some of you my not like me. I’m going to be more honest and may even drop an F bomb (though S bomb is more my style). You may unsubscribe. That’s OK, I won’t take it personally. Ain’t nobody got time for that!
I’m on a mission to help moms just like me, just like you. It’s a direction I’ve been moving towards my entire life. I’m psyched and hope you join me through all the twists, turns and bumps. I’m feeling the urge (FINALLY) to write, so I leave you with this.
I empower overwhelmed momprenuers to cut through the clutter and chaos in their home, schedule and mind so they can rock their business and they can stop losing their shit with their family.